giving a blow job on a jetski isn't as easy as it sounds.
Saved 180 Bucks tonight. Pulled my own tooth. More money to party with.
This beer is not sobering me up at all
He's 11. You dont draw dicks on 11 year olds, i dont care if he ate your lasagna
Semen is not good for contacts.
I'm trying to find candidates for my winter break hook up. I'm going to hold auditions thanksgiving break.
I don't want to be with anyone who doesn't accept me for who I am. eating cheeseburgers in bed is my favorite activity.
When we were grinding I think your nuva ring fell into my shoe
I'm hungry
Come here to eat and play. It'll be like Dave and Busters except with sex
omg i just made best friends with a deer. Im like the drunk santa clause.
Is it possible to break your brain with drugs?
Doing blow in the bathroom isnt the same without you
Do a rail off the baby station in my honor
I'm trying to watch Chicago PD and tell you I like your dick at the same time. It's a lot of work, ok?
I will teach you the ways of the ho life, my little gay grasshopper.
you were trying to drink the laundry detergent and yelling blue drankkkkk
Randomize
