Unmistakable female orgasm noises coming from upstairs shower
She must've brought a toy -- seriously doubt that he's up to the task
just a forewarning-if you come home and hang out with your stupid girlfriend the entire time that you are here/fail to get wasted with us i will wish either death upon you or that you truly do turn gay when you return to the navy.
You know you're wathing too much reality TV when you start adding commentary to every day life.
I wish i could tell a story about guys I know without the phrase "and then I blew him." coming up.
i just identified you from a description of your pipe
I swear he shrunk like 2 inches. Remind me that drunk sex needs to remain drunk sex.
It got kind of awkward when her dad brought home a 20 something asian girl at 3am
You kept making that girl eat peanuts, saying they were good for her baby..... I don't think she pregnant
Not after That Night. No. I hate tequila. And it hates me. Very mutual hateship going on.
he'll always be the guy that i fucked on the bathroom floor
I'm in your room because it's a safe space. Is it ok to pee in here?
Next guy I fuck must be a cowboy
My roommate just yelled at me for coughing. I'd like to yell at her for doing lines off our counter last night.
Jello shots? I thought you weren't drinking tonight.
Im not drinking im slurping
Long story short I ended up getting choked out by a really hot guy in the girls bathroom at a bar last night
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