i woke up with socks on this morning
so?
i didnt wear socks last night
A hot woman with candy. This is what heaven is filled with
So I'm going back to my apartment just to get my vibrator.
I thought you were moving in with your boyfriend for the summer?
Well....one will keep me from having to pay rent and the other satisfies. I'll let you figure it out.
there should be a rule- if you jizz on it, you wash it
You were mumbling a lot and offered me 20 dollars to leave you alone
Like... Chilling at home with a movie, hang out? Or have sexual intercourse in the backseat if his car, hang out?
I really hope that wasn't actually his first time. Because if my first time was anything like that I would NEVER have sex again.
We spent a good 10 minutes in the morning looking for my clothes. I ended up taking the bus home in my 6inch heels and his baggy t-shirt. The bus was filled with kids... one of them whistled at me.
He's def the type to chop us into bits whilst screaming "NAPA BITCH". AKA my type
after the fucking you spent twenty minutes vomiting naked and shaking your dick at my roommates. luckily, i don't remember that, or i'd have to be really insulted.
When are you going to accept the fact he is gay?
Come on... He's just practicing.
Ok. That's acceptable.
Getting "I couldn't find the front door so I climbed in through window" drunk seems to be a habit of yours
That was years ago. And it was chlamydia.
There is blood all over my sheets and no discernible source.
the universe is starting to freak me out.. ive now had sex with 3 people who were born on the same day..
Randomize
