i think im having one of those erections lasting four or more hours
I don't care if he acts like a don't exist 6 days a week. On the 7th day he makes makes my vagina cry. In a good way. Jesus understands.
Sorry for my penis texting you last night, I can't control what he wants at 4am.
they won't let me drive with my sombrero
Quick question: how do I take a nice picture of my ass? I'm asking you because I figure with an ass like yours you're probably experienced.
Haha he was not a poor little guy. If he'd talked to me or something I might feel bad. But since I saw him groping other girls as well as myself there's no sympathy coming from me
He's just picking out the right girl. I do the same thing with fruit. Grope them, squeeze them, smell them. I have to know I'm getting quality fruit.
I watched you fall asleep, sitting up, eating a cinnamon roll. You proceeded to wake up...smile at your cinnamon roll, ask it how it got into your hand and then began eating it again. You asked me if you were ridiculous last night, define ridiculous.
Dude you were sitting in front of me eating uncooked bow tie pasta...
Don't laugh, but I might need some advice on how to ride a crooked dick.
Ultimate cock block. About to have sex and your mom calls you so you can go help your grandmother figure out how to vote for the voice on her iPad
I wish more of my problems were easily solvable by taking a good long shit.
It was a good hour of moans, penis compliments, smacks, and what sounded like someone running in flip flops
Damn him and his beautiful face and body and penis.
Im at a south american orphan benefit auction drinking stoli in a coffee mug, this is what my life has become, thanks a lot community college
I purposely left my thong and accidentally left my ethics book, hairspray and most of my dignity.
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