i told him that if he starts being sappy its friends = off. he called me jerkface and drew on me w permanent marker. im either in love w him or we are twelve.
can we please move this conversation out of my vagina?
I think we should see other people.
Already working on it.
I think I might have accidentally had a threesome last night with two good friends. See, this is what happens when you leave me.
They have a pepper shaker for pot.
my brother is about to go smoke a joint outside... he's preparing his munchies on the counter beforehand. I admire his responsibility.
You threw up on yourself, then proceeded to tell us "to not make a mess in your car"
Notice: I will be intoxicated and in your area this evening. To unsubscribe from my sexual solicitation list, reply 'fuck off'.
Say hello to your nephew Sir Isaac Meriwether van Catsworth
I'm going to have to start taking your phone after ten. That's when all the cat pictures come
But seriously, I hug most of my drug dealers.
His ass WILL be my cock's next vacation home.
I wish I had a dick so I could say shit like that.
I didn't even know this guy existed until he'd had his hands down my pants, so I just went with it.
You're seeing with your vagina, not your eyes.
It's brunch. If you find dick at brunch. You an A+ hoe.
Chicks dig it when you smell like bong water and frebreeze.
Randomize
