If i come over, it means nothing
Having kids is risky. They might end up weird.
He said he only talked to me because I talk dirty in bed.
Tears do usually get me what I want. That and oral sex.
If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
She gave me a BJ with my hoodie on. it was like i was blowing myself.
He woke up, mumbled "silverware", and went back to sleep
So if a 2 is a 10 on the road... do we consider college to be "on the road?" help. its urgent.
Why is there a chicken nugget nailed to my front door?
Any chance you used one if the curtain rods in the fireplace room as a sword? One is missing
I'm bringing my passport in case we get drunk and wind up in Mexico
Brah, we should get a "do not disturb sign"... I can't have people knocking on the door while I'm high, it fucks with me way too much.
I have just discovered the land of milk and honey. and by milk i mean vodka and by honey i mean tequila.
He woke me with blue berry pancakes and a blow job. He's a keeper.
I mean, who hasn’t been fingered in there back of an Uber?
Randomize
