his internet history is a lot of porn, how to make a hovercraft and side-effects of jacking off too much
I'm 99% sure that for 3 hours I thought you were British. We must smoke that again.
Wow. Thanks for becoming another fan of something on Facebook. You make me want to gouge my eyes out.
we banged on the home plate. i wasnt even aware of the significance of where we were until afterwards hahaha
The fire breather is here so I may get my second wind.
I didn't just randomly come up with it. But if you want to give me extra credit for creativity I have a bare chest and chocolate sauce left
Don't I can pass these orgasm blushes off as sunburn for much longer...
It takes a special friend to go vibrator shopping with
Yes. It does.
Oh my god there are animals here. There are actusal animals trying to get him. A giraffe is trying to get in. A giraffee is trying to get in. Is ridiculouss.
Would you go as one half of Harry and Lloyd in Tuxes to Aaron's wedding?
I told my manager that I would be coming in to work either high from edibles on purpose or tripping on acid by accident so he knows to check my work tomorrow.
She wanted me to stick my dick in the birthday cake she got me
with the way the semester is going, being a stripper is starting to sound better and better everyday
I got home at 1 am on a weeknight with lube in my hair. I'd say it was a successful first date.
She really wants to put my dick in her mouth, and to be honest I really don't want to put it there.
Randomize
