All these guys look like the American Apparel version of Jesus...
giving a blow job on a jetski isn't as easy as it sounds.
Come downstairs. Moms serving wine for breakfast again.
Can we hire someone to dj while we have sex?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
That's like lying to my vagina. I can't betray it like that.
It was like the titanic mixed with those sad puppy commercials mixed with jello shots
I'm eating a piece of cake like an apple. At least my thought process is healthy.
there is no excuse for drinking mascato in your room alone while listening to one-hit wonders from the 90s
Recycling day makes me feel more like an alcoholic than regular days.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He told me he wants to eat me out all day while I lay in bed watching football. Seems like a solid foundation for a relationship to me.
Omg do you remember last night you kept pointing to your vag asking who wants to play this like a fiddle hahaha
He ripped off his socks and ran around the basement barefoot. His feet turned black. Then he chugged Parmesan cheese. He chugged dry cheese dude.
Been awake for 50 some odd hours. I've discovered I can spew out maaaad papers whilst coked out of my face. My roommates probably think I'm dead. Money well spent. You?
I wish our county sheriff had a comment section for their mugshots.
It does not feel like it was just this morning that I had a penis in multiple cavities of my body
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