i would punch a child for taco bell
There's a fat drunk walrus bitch here next to me and shes already puked and now falling on herself
OH FUCK NOW HER BOYFRIEND IS MAKING OUT WITH HER VOMIT HOLE
Sounds like a good blink 182 concert...
He told me to fart on his lap because the vibrations turned him on
Don't remember much from last night, but I recall slipping you the tounge. For that I apologize
1 month til my stepdad becomes a u.s. citizen, so if you want to get in on the divorce pool its your last chance, $5 a square.
In anticipation of No Judgement Tuesday, I believe a Can We LOL At What We Did Last Night Saturday is in order
The black hole just entered the party man, I can literally see guys starting to move towards her.
Hahaha wear something that says i'm here to party but wont go farther then a handjob.
Is it okay to send him a "thanks for the sexual awakening" note?
Like I cant decide if he's like autistic or something or just seriously cock blocks himself on purpose with this shit
Hey I consider Sunday's trip to the ER a success. You're alive and now you know for sure you're not pregnant. I got my highest ever Tetris score. Wins all around.
Update: pile o Coke party starting at approx 4 - 7 and going until 1ish to celebrate our founding fathers and love of cocaine and hatred of everyone\n
You can't go around chasing people and screaming JUST LET ME LOVE YOU. We're in a public place.
There is a dude with blue hair and a samurai sword and another dude dressed as Dead Pool. I daresay standard social conventions are not applicable in this environment.
Just calm down. My foot long super joint and I will be over shortly.
on a campus of 30,000 people, i should not be able to see every single guy I've ever hooked up with at one party.
Randomize