I'm starting a business if you want to get involved
oh boy
Its called Cut N Tugs, haircuts with happy endings
I microwaved pizza rolls, a hot dog, and bacon in the same plate with no paper towels. I drank the grease at the end. I'm going to vomit everywhere.
Just TALKING to him is better than banging my bf, imagine what actual banging will be like.
He upper decked the toilet, got himself lit on fire 6 times and lit 4 other people on fire in the course of 3 days.
casually drinking alone with your cats. do they like sparks?
In all fairness I didnt see your dick because it was already in her
the kid throwing up and laying face down on the deck just asked ME if I'M okay...
We have bigger issues at hand... Does anybody know someone in the kalamazoo area that is missing a pair of stilts ?
She shit all over my seat. She is not allowed in my car under any circumstances. Not even with drugs. You can't forgive a shit.
Hey where the fuck is the rest of my beer? Lets start this day off right
So just what does one wear when attending a sex toy party with ones mother-in-law?
Jeans and a nice top.
YOU GAVE HIM A BLOWJOB ON YOUR DOORSTEP?!
I just took three of the most beautiful hits of my life. As elegant and smooth and delicate and graceful as figure skating
Honestly, this is a first for me. I've always prided myself on my ability to pretend to get along with others.
Well. Another one of my exes came out of the closet.
Randomize
