You stole her bday cake and shared it with drunk strangers on the street.
well, it ended with me crying outside the strip club saying i don't want to be 21 anymoree. i'd say it was a great 21st birthday.
This is even worse then that time I fucked a guy just because he had air conditioning.
apparently he thought telling me 'the weasel wants to come out to play' would somehow convince me to go down on him
His thanks his mom for not having an abortion at his wedding toast. I love frat weddings.
That's unfortunate. Distance can be a stoner's greatest enemy.
You make it sound like a battle for Middle Earth.
Apparently while trying to get up from vomiting in the toilet I grabbed the seat cover for leverage and smashed my own head between it and the bowl. I don't remember this.
Just saw a drunk bitch in the west village peeing on a car. You are not alone.
I've never seen a guy eye-fuck someone so hard in my entire life. I thought he would develop laser vision, bore holes into your body, and not even realize your innards would be spilling everywhere. That's how bad it was.
She just asked if I wanted to eat nachos off of her boobs... I'm going to marry this girl.
So, anyways, aside from wanting to seduce my roommate for booze, how's everything been
Tell me not to drink and get on ladders. I think I need the reminder.. I'm clumsy enough sober.
There were firefighters and a fire truck up the street. I asked what was wrong and their exact words were "Just a tiny explosion; it'll be all right"
All i remember is looking at the bottle vodka that I was drinking and wondering how it was suddenly empty.
That may have had to do with you chugging it
There's a big ass bed, hella ecstasy, and I can guarantee you'll regret every second that you remember.
Randomize
