She was sucking his dick at Seacrets outside bar in front of all of us...her friends kept coming over crying and yelling "Tiffany stop it"
I REALLY appreciate you guys taking care of me when im wasted but i think its weird when i wake up in different clothes than black out in
Home remedy for the herp. Black tea. I need to strap teabags to my wang.
There was a canoe full of alcohol. It was literally a boat load of fun
Things I woke up with this morning: half a mcmuffin, orange hair, one shoe and a friendly german man. Tequila was a brilliant idea.
Went to the strip club with my aunt. Do you know how hard it is to be a pervert in front of your female family members?
Maybe you should start carrying pepper spray. You are like the Justin Bieber of lesbians.
Bone him for me, BONE HIM TWICE FOR ME.
Omg one side of my Labia is asleep. Has that ever happened to you?
My penis is saying yes, several less important organs are saying noo...
Tempting guys with beer and cheese. How Midwestern are we?
Turns out that Irishman put my panties under his pillow afterward. Thanks?
holy shit the yoga instructor bought his baby pig to class today
Dude. That's like masturbating until the point that you're going to climax, then stopping, waiting for a few seconds and then starting all over. While that does lead to an altogether more powerful orgasm, it's still annoying as hell until you get there.
I was not expecting that analogy.
No one ever expects that analogy.
Idk if I want to put a bra on
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