i mean you're really good at taking the morning after pill...so you could put that on your resume..
yeah, i think fast in a bad sitatuion and am able to react with appropriate measures
all we need is a shotglass and a helicopter.
I just showed my boobs to our astate representative hahahahahahha
I like your house better though. Cause it has febreeze and lube.
I don't think you have any idea how kinky that sounds.
Now there are nude photos of that bangin hot Russian spy chick...this is officially the best scandal ever.
we found you standing over and eating out of my neighbor's garbage can
Shots and making dong molds for my gf's friends. Typical Monday night activities.
Remember me drinking the vodka from in between your legs?
walk of shame this morning involved walking through the in-home daycare that she runs while it was full of kids. judgemental little shits. on a plus, got a juice box and a graham cracker for the walk home.
Nothing like moscato in your sinuses tobmake your night complete
Btw... when someone is licking your balls, "yeah... that's not the worst thing in the world" is not an appropriate compliment/thank you.
You should come by for the fire station blow job tour
We could have casual sex if you want. But I can't offer a bromance to a woman.
Dude so last night I was eating out my gf and her kitten climbed onto my back and fell asleep. AND SHE DIDN'T NOTICE FOR LIKE 10 MINUTES
I’m doing some soul searching to figure out how much of a slut I’m going to be the rest of the summer.
Randomize
