It was weird to see you drinking wine out a glass instead of a red cup today
I just witnessed Grandma making her infamous daiquiris. Extraordinary.
im just sayin im driving an hr to pick her up, just cause shes your gf doesnt mean i shouldnt be entitled to a bj
he just sent me a pic of him naked with a bucket of margarita mix hanging off his dick
i wish i coudl send you meat via computure
Some advice...don't play drunk rock em sock em robots. With actual people. I have bruises EVERYWHERE.
Just wait til you visit, there will be an endless supply of fresh dick for your demand #economics
Ew. After that you just pretty much proved that your vagina is the reason why my vagina needs two toilet seat covers when peeing in public restrooms
he has the ass of a greek god and he made me breakfast
The only way he could ever pleasure me is if he lit himself on fire and let me watch
Why does your life consist of lesbians, black guys and cats?
Don't go to jail over some guy named Bunky
HIS DICK IS GLORIOUS AND I WANT TO RIDE IT TO VALHALLA
I just went to cvs and bought condoms, handcuffs and a coloring book
But I’m still curious to know... how did the homemade porno go?
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