so my aunt is sitting on the couch, eating a brownie and watching the biggest loser saying how it's not that hard to eat healthy
man i love america
I remember asking you "need some dick tonite?"
Yeah I guess to me frat party equals penis party. oh the wonders of vodka.
Tell me the dirtiest joke you know
Sarah Palin
god, I love you
just threw up on my speech test, so much for a great semester
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He made off the wall shots in beer pong, stuck the girls dog in a cooler, and played with swords with her mom. I wish I got his name
when we went to bed he asked me to hold his penis so he knew i was there for him
Honestly... isn't she a psych major? how does she go through life NOT realizing that everything she does is a cry for help?
His response today determines what state my vagina will be in this weekend.
A surprise thumb up the ass and I'm wide awake. She was right, no need for caffine pills I could fight ninjas now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I guess? According to Jeff his mom is wondering when the grand babies will arrive. So I don't think they like ME so much as my supposed functioning uterus
I'm all dressed in my outfit from last night, and I'm not even the sluttiest person in Walmart right now. God bless Miami.
She started throwing ice at me and started yelling, "Holy water bitches! This is an exorcism!"
So when he asked me to go on a date tonight, I didn't think the words "have you tried a suppository" would be part of the evening.
I will most likely miss you the least and fondly remember you as Mr. "I need a minute" but really need 24 hours and 4 extra inches.
So far 2 of my professors caught me looking at their dicks
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