Why does it always sting when I'm breaking the seal taking a piss?
b/c u have herpes
No i said "always", not "since 2003" Asshole.
It was just so hard to get through Conan without crying like a baby. I'm just so proud of him.
so she asking me "is it okay to have dangling labias?"
I'm eating my dinosaur chicken nuggets in the order they would die in the food chain.
i could totally date him if i was just drunk the whole relationship
Yeah, all the sudden I heard a loud "ding" and realized I had been passed out on the dorm elevator for about an hour....
I'm gonna lurk in the mother fucking bushes and watch karma take him down like a gimpy gazelle.
The kid across the hall found me in the hallway using a hot pocket box as a pillow. I said its okay I live here.
we passed out in our seats at the game for about 3innings. I guess they showed it on the big screen. nap n rally!
Come back I feel like I ticking time bomb of
of drugs
He drunkenly stumbled over to me and told me my "crotch looks spectacular tonight"..... i think this could work
Been trying to fuck him since december. Finally got him into bed and he was uncircumcised. Why do bad things happen to good people?
She said she didn't know what fireball was. We are no longer friends.
That's good to know, because I will be doing terrible things to you. Terrible things, John, wicked, evil, maniacal things shall happen to you and I will have the audacity to call it sex
STILL COMPLETELY OKAY WITH THIS
you going clubbing tonight?
well its tuesday isnt it
Randomize
