Don't you think facebook is a bit pretentious, suggesting friends and all? No facebook, I would NOT like to be friends with a girl whose fiancee I have slept with.
As long as they suck a good dick I don't care what fruit they have and where they have it
And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
my bf wants us to fuck our way into the new year.. how original..
I threw up in the shower, slipped, and fell in it. Should I try and continue my day or just get back in bed?
He said that he didn't know what level the sun was on, and then he puked.
She told me she gets scared easily and that I had to protect her. Then I made a condom joke that ended up making her cry... All bad dude
I have poison ivy on my dick
WHAT
Because everytime she talks to you she goes in her room and plays Come Sail Away on repeat. Can't take this shit anymore Jake
I'm not allowed to have sex with him again. My vagina joined in on the protest. There was a petition. All my body parts signed it.
I feel like shit, and I can't get the band aids off my nipples.
My goal is to be drunk before we even get out of the No Wake Zone.
I don't care if he's the coolest coworker, if he's living in his mom's basement at 30 you should not buy drugs from him
I'll call you on my way home
Oh my god I'm going to die between now and then... can you at least tell me if y'all hooked up???
I'm sitting here with a band aid on my labia, this is a first
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