So he passed out in the bathroom of the bar, woke up thinking he was somewhere else and called her flipping his shit because he thought she left him. She had to go into the men's bathroom to find him, and then he told her she was "trying too hard to be his girlfriend" over and over again.
Dont they live together now? Havent they been together for like two years?
Yeah. That's the best part. I always thought he was kind of a pussy but turns out he's a degenerate just like us. Welcome
you know you made some mistakes when your last two boyfriends are both obsessed with women's curling...
I think I am the only girl in the world who would be proud of these scars from rug burn.
Upside of a two-day migraine: thanks to a prominent "E" in the middle of every pill, I think we can totally pass off Excedrine Migraine as ecstasy to stupid, drunk freshman. This is totally going to happen. That entrepreneurship course is paying off.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My hair is crimped, I am walking with a roadie, and my vibrator is in my purse. I feel sorry for tomorrow.
YOU TRIED TO SWIM IN HER FISHTANK. I don't think she's going to call you.
You know you're too high when you find yourself crying at " hand in my pocket" by Alanis Morissette because it's "just TOO REAL"
So like if I threw up in my purse is that "don't ever show your face in public again" worthy or just slightly frowned upon
Everyone is coupling up and I'm just excited the bartender gives me enough attention to order more shots.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
True strength comes from lack of pants
I just had a random tinder dude give me a ride home from school because my car is dead. Tinder rules! It's like Uber, but with boys who want to impress you.
You're a disaster
Wanna date?
So nothing to worry about, but i'm probly going to jail soon, just thought i should let you know so you didn't worry. Bye!
I don't even know if he's actually hot or just hot because he plays hockey..
You did not just say that.
Coffee and girl scout cookies. Breakfast of champions.
Get fucked.
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