i blacked out hard core.. it was bad peeeed muh bed
I'm jammin out to some Brit Birt, she's still my bitch, I love her crazy ass
Think about all of the events that have led to this: me sitting in the back of my classroom drinking beer out of a taco bell cup, telling the teacher I have to leave early to go to an AA meeting.
I need a pic of your cock for our cock collage
We made the pizza boy do Jell-o shots with us. He didn't even deliver to our house, we just called him over from the neighbors
We're sitting in his room writing songs about America. There's a verse about a dead dog. There's tequila everywhere.
And then you proceeded to sneak behind thee bar and hold up an empty bottle of vodka and scream LOOK WHO THE BARTENDER IS NOW BITCH!
got into a verbal altercation with Luke Harangoty last night over a table. Called him a cross-eyed fuck and got the table.
Sex aside I am really scared about Syria...
just remember the most important rule of taking psychedelics: monsters can't get through blankets
I like to oil my gears with cheap vodka and strangers
The magnum condom fits. I feel like a manly version of cinderella
I’m appalled by how severely I lower my standards when I’m horny & impaired
Passed out in someones front yard last night. Got woke u?p by a lady walking her dog at 6am. Rock bottom.
Why yes, I DID want cramps for Christmas, how did you know God?
Randomize
