In the car with my brother. His CD went from 2pac to Taylor Swift. I'm concerned. It wasn't a mistake, he knows all the words.
Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
twelve hours since my last beer and i just blew a .08, time to go to the library
there was a fucking fire juggler. but it was ok bc i was in the kiddie pool and it was the safe zone
He thought he was drowning because he was drinking water and intentionally holding his breath. Dear god what did you get me in to.
Oh and now he's calling me Brohammed Ali.
Do you think that we can get a group discount on liver transplants? We'll be like kids again!
I just don't do feelings in the summer months.
I mean thanks for the bj but i wanna forget everything that happened last night between 11 and 5
I feel like every young boy's first wet dream is too have sex with the Pink Ranger. I am now fulfilling that dream for one man. I am a hero.
I found a new button on my vibrator, tonight was a success
I just found your shirt hanging in a tree 4 blocks from the party...in the opposite direction of your house. where are you going?
So I took my bra off and threw it in the bushes before we went to the bars..
Also this morning I remembered seeing the stripper he threw up on later in the night. She was clothed though.
There is an episode of "how it's made" on tv right now. The subject is tequila and water beds. Basically my life.
We just started our own DARE program: Drugs are really enjoyable.
Randomize
