is it trashy that while he was throwing up in the bathroom, i was hooking up with his childhood best friend?
I found a dealer that takes plastic. I'm so in trouble.
i just walked into thanksgiving and three people in a row asked me who i was. really?
I feel like we're taking advantage of the fact that our R.A has cerebal palsey.
Just bought a disco ball for 5 dollars, of course we're drinking tonight.
dude. this chick is staring at me like i gave her brother herpes.
All I want is tacobeell and your body
that's my favorite sentence you've ever said.
Got a handy at the foam party. Took girl home. Banged her. Thanked her for foam handy. "what handy?"
We have a nice shopping list..vibrators and roller blades
Priorities
I've orgasmed so many times tonight I think I've become enlightened
The comfort of this onesie is keeping me single
He kept spinning my wedding ring like thanks buddy I remember
He has me blocked on facebook.... so I stalked him using my cats fan page.
I just got fed by 3 guys. I love my job.
Go ahead without me. This chick is buying me drinks and just found out her husband is cheating on her. I think I just found the next level of revenge fucking: Scorned Trophy Wife Sex
Randomize
