mrs. f**** your sons in jail, if you can help with bail please respond, if not please dont tell him i told you.
good penises are hard to come by.... must be the economy...
Sober Sundays just aren't working out anymore.
Oh you have a half-brother? Why that's right up my alley! Let's cause family strife
Tearing families apart since 2011.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm not sure if it was the 11 shots or your naturally vibrant personality but I recall you being quite noisy that evening
I'm driving while wearing hulk hands
I Can't even believe I threw all my pizza rolls at her, I mean not only did i ruin a good meal but now I dont have anymore
You know how I said I'd never worry about my roommate? Well I just walked in on her masturbating to Star Trek.
Did she boldly cum where no one has cum before?
A bee came out of the shoe box and stung her. Even the insect community doesn't want her in those hideous things.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I found you in the bathroom. You were sitting cross-legged on the floor wearing nothing but socks completely surrounded by broken crayons.
apparently they stopped looking at spit swabs under the microscope in bio ever since they found a sperm cell in one students sample
Honestly I was sitting in managerial accounting thinking "I really need to get my shit together and stop drinking so much wine." But when you asked I realized... it's wine. It's always a yes.
Is there evidence of another human being getting away with this/ not dying?
Maverick's sitting in jail wearing a turkey costume and I am soooo jealous.
I woke up remembering only that I got pulled over by a cop, then looked over and found that same cop, naked.
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