Who knew there were guys that wanted to only stalk you instead of date you? Count on me to find them!
u downloaded tardy 4 the party
then u started screaming about not wanting nene on the record
She made me cum so hard I couldn't hear for half an hour after
He would only do it doggy style. The "he's probably gay" debate rages on...
DON'T LET IAN EAT HIS PEANUT BUTTER!!!
Just remembered that I poured a whole bottle of tylenol in there. It's chunky. It's deadly.
Well, I looked over and you and him were each making out with a fireman. And then you switched. And you probably spent an hour like that.
in literally every picture i'm wearing less and less of my costume.
nothing worse than walking out of class after 3 hours and having covered exactly zero information
walking out with herpes. that would be worse
Just paid off my possession ticket on 4/20. Helloooo awesome.
So half of us were already throwing up outside when the Ukrainians ask us if we're ready to start partying yet. I love this country.
It was one of the greatest weekends of my life. And that's even after factoring in spraying myself in the face with the bidet.
There is a couple fucking in the outback bathroom and at first I thought it was sick but than I remembered my Outback fantasy with you and decided I can't pass judgements.
I need to get some goddam control over my hormones
It shouldn't be this hard to find someone who you haven't blown.
How are you feeling today?
Like Satan handed me a grenade and ass sandwich.
Randomize
