they thought it would be fun to get out their yearbook and see who hooked up with the most guys..I won...I don't even go to the same school
All you kept saying was "my dick ALWAYS causes problems".
i promise ill be ok...btw im only considered "not ok" if i end up in the hospital.
he was holding the bottle like a running back yelling for security and the national guard as he was being tackled
we spent fifteen minutes trying to convince you that you weren't locked inside of your car
We were talking about threesomes when she went to say who she would have as her third. She did not get to finish her sentence because her bf already said my name.My sheer presence destroys relationships.
she said i was like a little lamb and she felt bad for luring me into her den of sin. then she blew me.
Being a virgin isn't supposed to be this easy for you.
My internship group is made up of all freshman. Their enthusiasm for education and social interaction sickens me.
I just think his face would be more attractiveif it was framed by my thighs
the dj asked me quote "are you sure you're sober enough to do this?" And I grabbed the mic from him and said "ill fucking show you sober- HIT IT". I also dropped the mic at the end so he had to come around and pick it up
Shania Twain would have been proud
you gave a quesadilla a blow job with sour cream at Denny's.
It wouldn't be New Years Eve if we knew where we would be at midnight
Thanks to a bad fart decision during a production meeting, I am now on my way to Target to buy new pants. How is your day?
He tried to do a JoJo pose and wound up breaking his wrist in the process. Truly a story for the ages.
I have a mild substance abuse problem, but I'm still a functioning member of society. America.
Randomize
