I just am on my way home.. i had 3 and one startd crying and puking.. so they went home. one bitch fuckin ruined it for evryone.. u playin cards?
walk of shame with early morning football tailgaters. niice.
So i closed my laptop as i started to fall off my bed and then i caught myself and realized that moment of catching myself is the difference between tuesday and friday.
I jumped on his cock in 2 seconds flat. Thanks mom for sending me to gymnastics when I was a kid.
You are going to be so proud of me, I'm wearing underwear AND tights. That's two layers more than usual between my vagina and the world.
And the sky opened up and god said.... "WET T-SHIRT CONTEST!!!!"
I miss forts and drugs that made me believe in unicorns...
Dude the little bong I just got fits nicely in the cup holder in my car. The gods approve of my habits.
You haven't lived until you've thrown up naked in a hotel room in Fargo while holding your breasts so they don't touch the toilet bowl.
we should most definitely have a fire extinguisher in the apartment. like... for sure
Bruh why you gotta judge
You're awake at 3:30 in the morning RSVPing to a musical, I'm well within my means
How drunk are you?
Completed.
I’m a women at a strip club dressed as post Malone
I watched a compilation video today of a guy banging his sex doll to edm music. I just had to tell someone.
There is a french fry attached to my steering wheel and a note that says "eat me yum yum" can you explain this?
Randomize
