I don't care how bad it tastes, i just put it in my mouth and deal with it
I'm going to take the bottles back.. And maybe get an x-ray
My neighbor just watched me eat a granola bar without pants, this is a whole new level of unemployed
I just feel like I should give it a rest. I'm too old to be drinking bottles of grey goose and falling into koi ponds.
it's gotten to the point where there are no existing good choices. even our good choices are bad choice by anyone's standards but ours.
Fuck going to see The Hunger Games tonight. The only thing I'm hungry for is some dick. Let's go to the bar.
Considering adding a large amount of vodka to my tomato cup-a-soup at work. Save me.
The only way I can describe the noise he makes when he has an orgasm: dying walrus.
Would I waste your time for mediocre porn?
Stephen I'm in a lecture and the lecturer just said 'you can CHOOSE to put something in your mouth and swallow it" i'm the only one here who burst out laughing, this is awkward. Thought you'd appreciate it.
They'll never let you practice medicine.
Omg. I'm making you a chocolate and "herb" birthday cake and using joints for candles. I'm gunna need moms help with this!
I just ate cottage cheese and went to the gym at 6 this morning...the things i'll do because I might get naked in front of a new boy
My professor just paused class to answer a phone call from her dog. Im taking shots before this class from now on.
So you think Jesus would be proud of me for walking of shame into my apartment 10 minutes before I told my parents I'd be over for Easter?
good news, i've got tacos. bad news, kevin's in the ER. more good news, the tacos were free.
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