Anthony wouldn't know good sex if it sat on his face
We're 3 acts into this drag show and we've already run out of Lady Gaga songs.
I have a drinking game planned. Were gunna watch empire records. Everytime they say rex manning we have to take a shot
We had sex in the woods. It was great until some bird started mimicking my orgasm sounds
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I remember trying to cut the power to a house I thought was "too bright to understand the meaning of christmas". Pretty sure I blacked out down the street.
That birthday blow job you ordered came in the mail today. I suggest you hurry home.
I hate him. I fucked every one of his friends AND his fat brother and he still won't break up with me.
Go big or go home. Or get a live in house boy you met 7 years ago and feel like you have unfullfilled potential. You know, the usual
If by date you mean washing Pizza house down with a bottle of wine, then yes I have a date.
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Also I want everyone to be drunk at my funeral. Instead of wearing black just blackout. That way everyone can celebrate how fun I was
he went down on me while I ate Oreos. I don't know what caused the orgasm.
Nothing like being naked and confused and clutching a scented candle...at least I woke up in my own bed though.
It was great. Except he kept asking me to lick his butthole, I was like firm no
There is an episode of "how it's made" on tv right now. The subject is tequila and water beds. Basically my life.
I don't know why, but whenever I shave my balls I feel more aerodynamic.
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