he took off his pants and apologized in advance if I thought he was too small.
I may have been hammered and in a wheelchair but I definitely remember asking the hospital reseptionist to marry me
i just saw some one pass a baby through the drive-thru window at dairy queen.
Do you not remember you showing everyone in the bathroom your period stained underwear? I'd say you were pretty happy it came
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's cheaper then a lap dance and you get your hair cut.
its fine. mom just made me chug a long island. and made a crying face when i balked. we'll talk tomorrow.
Can an epipen be used as a tranquilizer ?
Dude she gave you head while I was in the closet, we've passed the "awkward" phase.
He's in a nude suit, bald, with a pink headband and a black sharpie streak down his forehead.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This is the I'm sorry text for running around yelling don't shit on my rainbow, end up in the fetal position crying at 4 am in my car because someone shit on my rainbow
I told him I was going to sit on his face after I got out of the shower, he threw up the arm boners and yelled "STEVE HOLT!!" I might actually stop sleeping with other dudes.
I'd cum everywhere if I could have chicken nuggets right now
Sorry I peed on your ottoman
Why is it pressure? I want to see your cute face and possibly sit on it. You make it like its a bad thing.
If you had a good reason for throwing the toaster at the wall, now's a good time to tell someone. My parents are on their way back and you know my dad and his pop tarts.
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