I just did the scooter of shame. New levels of embarrassment have now opened.
As far as classy things to do in front of your ex go, throwing up on your own shirt is not one of them.
my sister and i are watching a movie and pregaming together. and by pregaming i mean shes not drinking since she 14 and im drinking alone.
I just realized that the music from spongebob is also used in real sex HBO.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just criticized a porno's use of editing. Film school is ruining me.
I'm sorry for throwing the cheese everywhere, but it wasn't my fault. No one was enforcing disipline so not really my fault for not behaving
There's a guy in here whose face looks like it would be perfect between my legs.
Sent him a picture of my pregnant boobs from last year, think he'll notice the difference?
watched two friends get underages. one had a shirt on that said lets get wasted while the other said to the cop "i understand your just trying to do your job but that was dirty bro".
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She sucks enough dick that I could make her mouth a legitimate Yelp location.
It took 6 cruisers to bust the party last night. Cop asked if the theme was a beach party. I said I would fucking hope so with 8 tons of sand in the garage
It just smells like spaghetti and despair.
Any sexual interaction is meaningless without pizza during half time.
She gave me a job then fed me cheesecake in bed. She's a keeper!
Last night you were throwing up in my toilet singing "all by myself."
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