Someone's got a whale tail
A thong is hangin out?
No, a fatty following them
Who do you think planted the wheat? Who do you think cleared the land and killed off the native inhabitants? Women?
I head back to the dorms in less than a week I'm not ready to see my roomate naked that much again.
I just saw a dude sitting IN a bush, weeping and playing a harmonica. I hope your day is going better than his.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You have not lived until you've seen your mother stumble into the house with one shoe on mumbling incoherently about tequila cupcakes.
Its like the two hemispheres of my brain are in a death match but are two evenly matched for either side to win kinda drunk.
When we asked you how you got there you replied in all seriousness, "rode my legs"
tell her i changed her phone's unlock password to be the length of my fully erect penis in centimeters. I'll be in my room for the next two hours.
I have to take a quiz before midnight. Trying to decided if its a better idea to take it now when I'm stoned or later when I'm drunk.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sloppy and selfish. Your 27 and you don't know where my clit is? BYEEE
I miss the days where our biggest worries were who was gonna win battle shits.
He somehow always manages to get me naked within 5 minutes of being together. It's like fucking witchcraft.
Ain't no cockblock like hearing the word"HOOODOOORR!" shouted from the bedroom floor while in the middle of sex.
there is a tent in the living room. its a vip tent room. i want in.
When the paramedic asked Logan how he fell he explained that he was trying to lick his eyeball, missed and tripped over his own tongue.
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