16 and pregnant actually makes me really happy that i'm gay
He just asked me if I ever had the urge to put a zucchini in my ass.
Is it standard protocol to defriend someone after they give you chlamydia?
all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
It's a Lindsey's Going to Jail Theme party.
I THREW AWAY MY VIBRATOR BECAUSE IT INTIMIDATED HIM. WORST. DECISION. EVER
My roommates just built a mini golf course upstairs while I was sleeping.
It felt as if we were fucking on a sea of baby feet and morgan freemans face hair
Hahahahaha. That's what your stoned ass gets for eating half a bag of processed cheese at 2am.
moral of my life: don't tell a guy you want to have sex with him. he'll get back together with his ex.
She just called at a dance party, and you stopped mid puke to join. Another successful night.
The Vicodin is in the strawberries.
Well I found my neighbors on tinder if you're wondering how my night went
These flip flops mean I'm casual, but I'm here to fuck.
Guess who won a basket of sex toys in front of his parents, aunts, uncles, sister, and cousin...
Randomize
