Really? You have stories that rival having a threesome with the two best friends of the guy your kinda seeing? Thats impressive.
I let some guy put hot sauce in my asshole for his birthday
I had to remind him that there is no "age exchange rate" between the u.s. and spain, and that 16 will always equal 16
i wish peter jackson would direct porn
Package from mother. Contents: Cookies, my old pokemon cards, and condoms. Note: "These have a July 2010 expiration date so give them away or use them with a gal that would be a great daughter in law. Love Mom" Love you too momma
I put bits of fruit cocktail in the jello shots i made because i knew that they were gonna be the only thing we ate all day
We are casual work acquaintances that occasionally fuck when the urge strikes. CWATOFWTUS. I know FWB rolls off the tongue better but it is what it is.
Just a heads up, i'm sleeping in te back seat of your car so don't be freaked out when you see me in the A.M.
if things do not go as planned you should see me walking down I81 blindfolded and pantless
All of her cloths were on our coffee table this morning. The only things she left with last night were her shoes and Scott
I think I'm going to give him a welcome back to single life blow job
The beer shits the day after completing the World Beer Tour at Epcot are just as epic as the tour itself.
i don't think fitbit tracks "flipping the fuck out" as activity.
We could probably bang our way to enlightenment. However acid helps.
There better be alcohol at this child's birthday party. Seriously not trying to be entertained by a clown while I'm still sober.
Randomize
