The bird has been looking kind of ugly lately...gotta look nice to fly with the hawk ya know?
come downstairs quick. our boyfriends are having a dance off in nothing but their underwear and shoes. and they have semis too.
There was a picture of him proposing on the night stand and their dog watched, but I can't help myself, his dick is just so perfect.
I passed out leaning next to a light pole. When the cop woke me up at 4 AM, I told him I was a block away from the apt, just had to stop to make a puke pit stop.
Im pretty sure you told the waiter at Dennys last night to take your pants off or show a nipple.
The rest of us are chipping in to soundproof your bedroom. This is getting ridiculous.
Is 'too horny to study' a good enough medical excuse to not take a final?
I seriously think I got run over last night.. My sides are bruised and I got a ride home in the limo from the office.
They were scared I was going to get lost last night so they dressed me up as Waldo so someone would always find me.
He put my hand on his penis and said welcome home.
I ate a hotdog off the ground last night.
I found the guy I hooked up with last night on Wikipedia, at least now I know how old he is.
I'm not sure what happened last night but my dog has a red cup taped to his back with a little beer and a ping pong ball in it..
We invented a new game.
there is a tent in the living room. its a vip tent room. i want in.
So how do u get your coat out of the coat room when someone is fucking on it?
Randomize
