Tell him to shut up cuz i said so. I lost my dollar shoe :(
Riding home in a carseat. Worst. Night. Ever.
I have "you made mistakes last night" written alllll over me.
He fucked a visibly pregnant girl. It doesn't get weirder than that.
if things do not go as planned you should see me walking down I81 blindfolded and pantless
You straddled the banister and fell down the stairs, then proceeded to crawl back up them, I think you need to lay down
There is someone hissing in the hallway. Not even a typo. Not pissing. Hissing. Like a large cat. Or a komodo dragon.
I like making it seem like it's at least a little bit difficult to hook up with me
Why is it every time you ask me what I'm doing, I'm at a police station?
I think the worst was the guy who sent me YouTube videos about how age doesn't matter, and then a link for natural breast enhancements. Kill me.
You puked on yourself, then demanded to take shower. In which you kept saying "its raining"
you said you couldn't hang because you had to masturbate and feed your lizard
He just used the word frick. Is that a possible red flag?
I'm on the Coaster ride of shame, currently sitting across two nice old ladies smelling like condoms.
Why let a Christmas Eve hangover ruin a perfectly good Christmas Day acid trip?
Randomize
