I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
sorry about calling you the devil all night.
Puked on a Tom Jones impersonator on the strip
Standing in line for a prescreening of Alice in Wonderland - guy just passed out cold in front of us - first drug overdose of the Alice in Wonderland phenomenon witnessed.
update. expensive tequila only makes the mistakes more expensive.
Thanksgiving break drinking is a marathon, not a sprint, and i need to be well rested
I just spent the last 30 mins playing uplifting songs to my uterus, & there's no way I'm pregnant.
Curse you and your alcoholic milkshakes.
You're welcome.
This is the third year in a row that Mario has fallen through a table on New Years. I'm sensing a tradition developing.
You yelled "Everybody!!! Round of applause to Jill for not doing anal!!" Right in front of him.
not ubering you a puppy
Well, I told him that it's not all about him. Then I gave him the best blow-job in the history of blow-jobs.
I need my sock, sombrero, maracas, and I just heard I had a light saber, if thats the case...i want that back too
Idk, I know when I drink vodka my bi side comes out and I just want to make out with a girl
That man makes my giblets tingle
Congrats? I think?
Randomize
