Billy Mays is dead too!
Somewhat annoying American icons better be watching their backs
We totally just fucked in a closet. These vacations with his family are causing creativity I never thought I had.
well judging by the amount of dired blood around my nipple rings i'm gonna assume it was a good night
It's not prostitution until you're out of college. Right now it's just strategic boning.
Roommate is eating a chimichanga, watching Dr Doolittle 2 and weeping. His Tuesday hangovers make me feel better about my life.
You're welcome to join, but just to warn you, tequila makes my clothes disappear. And I'm telling you that as an adult to an adult, not as your supervising teacher who decides whether or not you graduate.
The bellhop gave us weed in our keycard envelop. We went down to tip him and he apparently never gets that so he just gave us more weed. Kentucky is strange
HOLY FUCK I JUST GOT WOKEN UP BY THUNDER!!!!!
I THINK I SHARTED
I learn from experience and I experienced what it would be like to completely lose my mind and then wake up with a stab wound.
Do you know how to get blood out of tile grout?
I think it really helped to be hungover at accepted students day. it gave me a good feel for how it would be everyday if I go there.
I'm not gonna lie, my internet creeping skills scare me. I'm like Liam Neeson in Taken
so, i guess i gotta chill on showing up to work hungover... someone anonymously left a bible in my work mailbox (no one else got one)
But of course I'm in. After all, what fun would the holidays be without trying to find the perfect gift to impress someone you've never met, but need the approval of??
On a side note, my ex husband offered to buy me shrooms
Randomize
