I'm cheating on the girl I'm cheating on my girlfriend with
my mom walked in on me smoking weed alone, listening to the eagles, and just staring at the river. she totally knew.
Apparently I had an idea for a cooking show and then proceeded to throw cookies at people.
Please know that I fully expect you to help me steal a bed if I have a bad breakup.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I never thought your mom would see me throwing up on my hands and knees in your front yard
We should search craigslist for porches to sublet.
When exactly does a bender just become a lifestyle?
Hungover. Have to fix everything I've broken. I'm gonna be very late.
Blow job season was short but glorious.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He whispered "Are you feeling it now Mr. Krabs?" when he was inside me. That is NOT my fetish.
My room looks so cute. Who wouldn't want to hook up with me in here?
Ok, stop saying "youths." You're 23.
She was wearing a grass skirt and a watermelon bra. WATERMELONS.
If you ever get divorced...would you call me??
Do not let Mike show you his naughty Santa Claus outfit. It's a super long beard and crotchless pants.
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