woke up in a shopping cart using a keystone box as a blanket. how was your night?
And by the way, how is me getting head even remotely comparable to you fucking 3 guys?
Def ran into my elementary school babysitter at the grocery store. Still hot. And she complimented my beer choice. It feels good to still have her approval
I could tell by the Randy 'Machoman' Savage "hey brother" that you were beyond inebriated
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He knows as soon as he hits chameleon eye status drunk, he is guaranteed to piss the bed we NEED to push him there
Pretty sure God shed a tear when I put 15 singles in the collection plate.
Just finished putting caution tape around the tv. Sober me needs to prepare.
He wanted me to blow him while he did curls and looked at himself in the mirror. Not sure if gay or ego maniac.
Sex with him is like pizza, it can be shitty but its stillll pizza.....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How do I go about this? "Hey, its my birthday in 40 minutes. Would you like to come over for some sex? Also, please bring snacks"?
I sleep better at night when I win things. I never really weep for others.
a guy just skateboarded past my window in a bunny suit while chased by a dog walker
She said she didn't care that I was gay and wants to ride the fucking rainbow
I'm just really glad SD weather is so erratic so I can get away with wearing a scarf in May to cover up these hickeys.
There’s a child, alone, sitting on a picnic table out there, making bird noises
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