2 v-cards in one night. impossible is nothing.
New Jersey isn't a real state, it's just a myth you tell little kids to scare them like Canada or Carrot Top
i don't think i ever formally apologized for that time i threw up on your dog.... well...here it is...
Get to the bar. Power hour leading up to the rapture.
I wonder if i could put a dildo on my bike seat to encourage me to exercise.
Well for better or worse the home brew is almost done, want to get drunk/loose your sight tonight?
Half way through sex he whispered in my ear, " your the second best I've ever had" then proceeded to tell me to sit on his face.
There is a man playing a trumpet at this brunch and I hate life. Too hungover for this. Send help ASAP.
Maybe she'll change her mind but the "go fuck yourself" doesn't seem promising
I just started the bonfire using a tampon. Who knew they could have multiple uses?
So the other day we finished having sex and he literally said "what are we going to do about your vagina?" Like, I hadn't even dismounted him yet.
When you wear a dress that resembles the shape and color of Kirby to a wedding, you get the attention you deserve.
I went to the hospital to have my arm checked out, and they already knew the story. They gave me props for posting photos on facebook before even coming to the hospital.
If your talking about a poncho I WANT ONE
Please tell me why we have been neighbors since elementary school and waited until the night before I moved to fuck.
Randomize