She went from zero to smokin in five shots
I just stuffed five dollars in my near empty box of camels to remind myself to buy more. And my mom says I don't budget my money
I just realized that i have never seen about 30 percent of my friends sober before
I like yr title more along "the hot Russian I have sex with."
I just want to point out that nothing makes my hickie/hangover more obvious than sleeping in a scarf and sunglasses. nothing.
I just sent you a multitude of sexual pictures...and you responded with a Charles Dickens Quote.
I never want to do this again, I'm going to chew off several fingers and apply for disability
I did not appreciate your texts about spanking at 3'o'clock this morning.
I just realized I haven't had a date or a potential possibility of a date in about a year. Then I realized I wanted to actually go on a date. But I'm sitting here getting high instead of being at a party. Life.
Ew. He is mine. We all know that if he has a mid-life crisis and decides to sleep with a student, I AM THAT STUDENT. She's not friends with him on FB. Reassuring.
he's so sweet and its so cute. but I swear to fuck if I let my guard down and this was all a lie I am going to become a serial killer.
I don't remember what you did, but I DO remember that i'm supposed to hate you for it.
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
Where'd you go?
Laundry, im. A responsible drunk
I smell of tequila and Im going to a funeral. This is my life.
Randomize
