Are you with Adam and his vodka?
Yeswdsssss I masde his pickle gi away ans he go anbnoued
I just saw a girl on crutches doing a walk of shame. She is either super dedicated, or her night didn't go as planned.
its been so long even thinking about having a dick inside me makes me sore
Just met another girl you fucked but this time in seattle. Your cock gets almost as much mileage as jet blue. Anaheim and seattle both say hi, figured you don't remember their names.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just pulled a muscle trying to take a naked pic. I think it's time to start working out again.
There was no eligible dick at the ER. I'm pissed. Looks like "Searching for Strange at the Local Free Clinic" is a no go for the name of our first full length album. On the other hand, I got a dilaudid shot and I no longer feel like I have the worst bladder infection of my life.
His penis could choke an elephant. A baby elephant... But an elephant non the less.
Mind if I sleep with your cousin? If I can... thanks. If no, sorry its gonna happen.
How does one tell their boyfriend they're pregnant with someone else's kid??
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
idk what happened last night but i just wokeup with nothing on but a necklace...what is this, the fucking titanic?
Do you think it would be weird to wear a shirt that says 'big fun small package' from an ex for a first date?
I'm worried about us. We are almost 30 and we still drink jaeger bombs till we black out. Wait, no I'm not. I'm excited about us.
What do you want. Tryin to service my husband like the good wife that I am. It is bj Tuesday
Oh my god my purse is too heavy for me to dance with boys cause it has too many stolen sink faucets in it
she was all excited about us being eskimo sisters and then i was just like "alyssa i've literally been inside of you" and she got even more excited
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