Anthony wouldn't know good sex if it sat on his face
it makes it look bigger when i shave, i hope its not the same for a girl
Nah, I'm just going to keep fucking him until he realizes we're perfect for each other.
Pretty certain he passed out for a while going down on me. Absolutely certain he passed out during the blow job.
it only took 2 hours but we managed to melt the purity ring down with a butane torch
i told the cop we knew everyone at the party, it was 250 of our closest friends and she's like funny nobody on the balcony knew whose house this was
Thats why they were on the balcony!
we're decorating our christmas cookies with birth control. so pretty.
If you think for one second that I would forget Mardi Gras, you clearly don't know how much I love boobs.
Amazon.com "suggested" I buy both nipple clamps and opera gloves.
well a fat roach just fell out of my hair. so there's that
We were ushered out of Medieval Times by a squire for making out in the torture chamber. Children were present.
What procrastination leads to: I have submitted a third of my job applications this week with a BAC that would get me arrested
Under no circumstances is tits McGee to make that kind of decision about my life!
It does not feel like it was just this morning that I had a penis in multiple cavities of my body
We’ve got a propane heater on our back porch if you want to come over and eat a McRib in peace
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