They past out watching a re-run of the 1984 presidential debate on cspan
I was going through my mom's high school yearbook...almost half the people who signed it referred to her as "Karen Smokejoints", "Confused Karen", or drew a picture of a joint. I have never felt more like her daughter.
My walk of shame got a new perspective when I walked into his livingroom and found his roommate fucking some chick on the coffee table.
I just had a heart to heart with a stripper I'm becoming a dentist.
Well, I'm at the grocery store wondering whether I exist or not.
I've made a list of places I want to have sex this summer. #1: Reptile House at the zoo.
Would you like season tickets to my vagina?
I can't get over how you look like his sister and he wants to fuck you.
If you really loved me, you'd support my weed habit.
As the person who squeezed you out of my vagina, the answer is no.
btw, whatever u do, dont try and take that towel away from her..i tried, it got ugly..she said some things im sure she regrets.
my last search of the night was "the physics of green eggs and ham" what the fuck
I don't want to just break his heart, I want to dip it in liquid nitrogen and then smash it until it's powder and snort the powder
He stopped in the middle of us fucking so he could turn on lithuanian techno music. And the sad thing is that it was the best sex of my life.
I can't dude. Last time I was there, I blew the bartender in the bathroom at last call.
I am in no place to make rational decisions, but right now i want you inside me
Randomize
