this mix will be the most desperate cry for affection in the history of itunes.
he passed out on the stove with a cup in his hand. yes the pictures are hilarious
No driving. The car is spinning. I am praying for mcdonalds.
his roommates said i can move in if i promise to only drink tequila the rest of the semester. challenge accepted.
I'm currently day drinking, studying and making corn. Don't tell me what I can't do.
ATTENTION ALL CONTESTANTS OF SLUTFEST 2012 ; not only will we be judging on how many penis you have sucked but also girth and length will be calculated. If you are found lying you will be disqualified. Remember your fellow participants will be rendering the same services to probably the same people. So choose wisely and let the games begin!
It's not really that big. Girls just think it feels big. It's a cocktical illusion.
There's a bag in my room with garbage, a thong, fritos, and an electrical cord. I'm assuming it's yours
........yyyyyyeah that's me
Dude if i sent you a picture of the inside of my fridge would you be able to break down and explain everything that was in it?
My new successful method of booty calling is sending a screencap of a map with the shortest route from their location to mine highlighted.
Dude I'm so clean right now. Like I feel insulted that I can pass a piss test.
And then I went through the chix filet drive through for breakfast in all my republican post sex glory
Also I just took the BEST ass selfie of my adult life.... it's gonna be a good day haha
Dude. If you guys end up really liking each other, the color of his pubes won't matter. I wouldn't break a sweat.
We got stoned and watched Disney movies all night. I think I'm in love.
Randomize
