I'm drive I can fine osifer
Is it normal that I have to take off my pants to get mouth stitches removed?
ohhh my god. this party should be titled "my hookups of summers past" be expecting some good stories tomorrow
hooked up with a girl who spoke elfish last night..what up 8th grade lord of the rings fantasies
i'm pretty sure i lost all sex appeal when he caught me peeing in his bushes
oh but the power of the cock will take you to places you never been..i flew to hawaii once to sleep witha chick
I feel like we had some profound moment last night, but I can't really recall much past your ass turning up the volume on the radio.
I wish Samuel L. Jackson would narrate our bar crawls
There needs to be a crayon color for how blue my balls are
I will give you all my nachos to make this happen
HELP! How do I get paint off the dog?
He went out to smoke and when he came back I was still in the same spot naked and unable to breathe.
All I could say was, "ladies and gentlemen, THIS is why I drive 30 mins"
I'm turning into an adult here.
Adults touch each other's special zones.
Ultimate fat girl moment: I promised him my mouth for the night if he bought me a funnel cake..
I Projectile vomited a massive question mark on Brent's bedroom wall. Don't tell him it was me. I want him to play the whodunit game.
Randomize
