She's dressed as Musafa. How could this not be a good idea?
Thank God for cruise control and the Starbucks cup I had to puke in.
tan lines, throwing up everclear on the beach, doing lifeguards, tequila...summer.
apparently he couldn't remember my name so he refereed to me as whats-her-boobs and everyone knew that it was me he was talking about
i think the penis that was inside of me changed my life
I left after my shirt got dropped in the toilet thinking that there was absolutely no good that could happen the rest of the evening. I hear I was very wrong.
Apparently i asked the cab driver how much the ride was going to cost, (he said about $25) then i offered him 50 to let me drive the cab...
She is larger then a hippo. You could cut her open in the middle of a blizzard and crawl in like Luke skywalker. Throw a couch and a tv in there and you're set
It's like if a cloud had tits and you laid on them.
And then, I saw the prophecy come to fruition. It was the Dick of Destiny.
And he came all over himself. At least he didn't ruin my new lulus.
Actually though that could've been bad.
You tried to wave to Meg on Family Guy and got upset because she wasn't waving back
I find him attractive in the absolute weirdest way. Like I need him to do my taxes, but I also feel like I should spill things on him to gain his attention and then lick it off to gain his affection.
You can't leave me alone in times of distress because I will fuck things 🙈😐
Can you get the dildos out of the shower before the maids come?
Randomize
