need another drink. this is the easiest way
evidently tequilla and lady gaga make me flirt and grind shamlessly with other men infront of my boyfriend.
Seriously? Do you have me saved in your phone as 'check every 3 months to see if she's single yet'?
so this guy on craigslist is offering a case of beer to shave his back. i think i'm gonna take him up on it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Cops showed up at 4 am to address a noise complaint and she called them pussies for not doing shots with us.
im never drinking wine from a person in a wet suit and goggles ever again.
Pre-drinking/conditioning my liver for this impending hurricane party associated with cat. 2 hurricane Irene. Be ready to roll in a weather channel minute.
Oh you don't have to buy a shower curtain, I stole the one from her bathroom. It has dolphins on it.
i dont trust my judgment anymore so im only going to fuck guys who can donate blood at the red cross. they have standards.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How was the birthday sex?
Shit got outta hand. Honestly I think even my STDs have STDs.
I'm really sorry that I blew your friend in your bed, but to be fair he started it.
Long story short I'm making an I'm sorry card for a girl I dont remember having sex with
Just broke my no shot rule again.. Made out with a stranger. That's 0 for 3 this month for the record
I just showered and shaved both ankles and one knee because that's the skin that's exposed in the jeans I'm wearing today. Please tell me I'm not the only one who does that.
Did I tell you I’m going on a date? His name is Michael and we both like dinosaurs and anal.
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