I just got back to Nicks and I shoul dnot have drank this much when I have to work at 7AM!!!!!
I feel miserable, can't drink that much when I go out
We've been saying that since '98
sometimes you just have to masturbate at your friend's house.
why didn't you say something constructive like "stop chugging that vodka"?
I found him crying and drunk, in my closet holding a picture of Tyler Perry. He managed to say"he's just so many people"
he went up stairs with nothing on but calvin klein's and an eskimo hat, said hi to her dad, got a doughnut, and left like it was an everyday thing
Just threw up. It looks like I may have swallowed a cigarette.
What does puking wasabi feel like?
Like snorting cocaine backwards.
Did your surprise acid trip turn out well?
He just pulled out my weave during sex....needless to say I'm embarrassed and in need of another shot pronto
You said you brought chipotle into a movie and I asked you to marry me and you said yes
I'm gonna be the best dressed mother fucker to ever get kicked out of that damn bar.
In my top drawer right now, there are see's chocolates, condoms, weed, and my vibrator. One way or another, this is going to be a good night
just woke up and had to check if i still had pants on, i really need to stop drinking
I've been drunk texting you for weeks, and you watched me puke outside your house... I say it's time we meet in person.
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