I did that thing where I cum for no reason again.
she said it was ok for her to take her top off in the hot tub but she didn't take off her bottoms because that would be slutty
Fact: my bamboo plant has grown 2 & 1/2 inches since I started watering it with bong water
I'm so ready for finals. She finally agreed to skypesex me from spain so now i'm up until 4am studying every morning waiting for her to get online
If we both stop thinking about your penis for just a moment, we'd realize it is important and good that you are spending quality time with your family
I don't have any swimsuits that don't show off the weird handprint bruises on my hips. Do you have a onepiece I can borrow?
Well, love is in the air. And by that I mean: it seriously smells like sex in here.
You never know, some chick could have a weird unibrow fetish.
You started an entire relationship based only on sex and emoticons.
earned some solid air miles from the plan B I just bought. #silverlinings
Never has jello made me angry to the point of drinking. But here I am.
I was looking for a pen and I stumbled upon my mom's vibrator. On a related note, yes I will be going out tonight.
Shit. My boss is having me meet and greet with the new doc upstairs. Do you think his doctor powers will detect that I'm still high?
also. when i get a car, the amount of space there is for sex WILL be a huge deciding factor.
I may have made out with your roommate and your cousin tonight. In my defense I thought both of them were your cousin.
Randomize
