Hey sorry i havent responded. i threw up on my phone while i was sleeping
I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
my grandpa was trying to put butter into the pepsi and i'm like "grandpa what are you doing" and he looks down and goes "well i guess that wouldn't taste good anyway"
Xanax and allergy medicine look a lot alike when you spill them on the floor. Just saying that I still have allergies but I'm unsure if I still have legs
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Brutal- a couple weeks back I had a 28 hr blackout and four day hangover. S'why I decided to haul it in
He had a ladies night special at his place. Unlimited jello shots till 10, 50 cents after.
I got a phone call from security asking me to do my laundry wearing more than a blanket next time.
Apparently there was a point in the night that they literally thought he was dead, ass naked on the floor. That bad.
Now all we have to do is pretend we haven't seen each other naked. Work tomorrow is going to be FUN.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Because once my penis is in motion, it stays in motion unless another force acts upon it.
went to their party, left halfway through to fuck a pledge, came back to keep drinking. I think everyone won.
I'm drinking coffee out of a pasta sauce jar and eating fruit soaked in Smirnoff. I think I've hit rock bottom.
I told the American that we should start banging in Canada incase I get hurt and have to go to the hospital.. is that rude to say?
But he's super into Jesus and I'm the devil. So we weren't meant to be
Why are my jeans soaking wet and smell like chlorine??
Bc u told a stranger in the hotel "I have sinned' and made him get into the hotel fountain and "baptize u". I've got a vid
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